As usual when I visited Arlene’s blogspot I found this test (I wonder where she got all those test sites :) as expected, it turned out that I’m a "male" writer. I was not surprised by the outcome. I always had this funny feeling that maybe He was so busy packaging babies the day of dec. 12 that He placed some male features on my pack. buti na lang he placed a matching female brain and heart :).

Female Score: 410
Male Score: 564

Aphrodite/Eros


?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

Monday, Dec 15, 2003: DOST called to inform me that i have an interview the next day at 9:00am

Tuesday, Dec 16, 2003: I had an exam and was interviewd by the DOST-NAST panel

Wednesday, Dec 17, 2003: They called me to inform, me that i was accepted and can start on Dec. 29, 2003.

whew! everything's happening so fast! but guess what? it just feels so right... i don't know why... :)

11:50 pm
Ten minutes to go before my birthday. I would like to take this opportunity to thank God for all the blessings, love, understanding & forgiveness that I have received from him - nakanang! Parang pang best actress sa Famas ang blog ko ngayon! :) - no, kidding aside, when I was in grade 5 as soon as my adviser, Mrs. Rory Escaba realized that it was my birthday that day, she told me never to forget to thank God for giving me life. And that's what I’m doing right now. I am thanking Him for his love. I’ll be eternally thankful even though I know that it will not suffice for what you've done to me.

12:05 am
I want to thank the following for remembering:

• Catz for giving me an electronic card last Dec. 8, 2003.
• Marah and Pinky for sending me e-mails and greeting me.
• Arlene (my bestest best friend) who gave up 5 days of 'pagtataray' for me - from dec. 8-13. When i asked her why only for five days, she told me that beyond that it would already kill her - hehehe!
• Mila, for calling me just to greet me ~ hi ging advance happy birthday! 11-dec-2003 14:50:55.
• Ate Vic: happy birthday, guadididie! Mwaah. Love you!
• Conzy: happy birthday to you happy birthday to you happy birthday, happy birthday to you! May god grant whatever your heart desires & continuously shower you with his blessings. Take care! Mwaah!
• Mark: happy birthday 12-dec-2003 01:20:27

12:48
Arlene called me :) and even though she wouldn't admit it, I know she loves me! Thank you! Mah!

3:58
Tita Flor: happy birthday to you wonderful lady! 12-dec-2003 03:58:43
Tito Eddee: a Ferrari picture message :).

Text messages received:

 Mama: Happy happy birthday. Wishing you more success, happiness, power and money. I love you. 12-Dec-2003, 04:37:16
 Arlene: Psst! Happy birthday worm! 12-Dec-2003, 07:14:47
 Cha: Happy happy birthday! :) God Bless! Enjoy! Miss you! Mwah! Mwah! 12-Dec-2003, 07: 20:54
 Jep: Happy Birthday. Wish you good health and success in your life. Love you. 12-Dec-2003, 07: 47:05
 Jaike: If I could give you a wonderful gift... I wanna give you the ability to see yourself the way I see you, so that you'll know what a wonderful person you are. Happy birthday! God bless you. 12-Dec-2003, 07: 59:37
 Tito Dan: Good Morning Jing-jing. Happy Birthday! May Blow-out ba? :) 12-Dec-2003, 08: 31:15
 Ice: Happy Birthday sa atin! 12-Dec-2003, 10:24:02
 Leynen: Guada, happy birthday! Uy what time mo ba kami meet? Gusto mo kita na lang tayo sa mega? Kita na lang tayo dun? 12-Dec-2003, 10: 34:52
 Raciel: Happy birthday Guads! 12-Dec-2003, 16: 25:46
 Mayet: Hello! Happy birthday! God bless! Mwah! 12-Dec-2003, 16:26:15
 Pebbles: Hello! Happy birthday. 12-Dec-2003, 16:42:54
 Kathy: Happy birthday girl! 12-Dec-2003, 16:49:52
 Riza: When you find a dream inside your heart don’t ever let it go… for dreams are the tiny seed from which beautiful tomorrow grow! Just believe all things are possible! Happy birthday friend! Miss you! 12-Dec-2003, 19:12:06
 Ge: Happy birthday! God bless! Mwahh.. :) 12-Dec-2003, 19:34:45
 Don: In all your ways, may your days be in the shelter of the Lord, blessed by His love, led by His light, kept by His grace. Happy birthday to you! :) 12-Dec-2003, 20:29:33
 Maciel: Happy birthday best friend! I love you! Mwah!!! 12-Dec-2003, 21:41:58
 Arlene: Tapos na birthday mo! Hehe! 13-Dec-2003, 00:00:54
 Kris: Belated birthday! Guada gurl! :) 13-Dec-2003, 00:05:37
 Gian: Ate, Happy Birthday! 13-Dec-2003, 17:37:45

And last but not the least; I want to thank Leynen and Baby for being with me the night of Dec. 12, 2003. I was so amazed and grateful that you stayed with me.

Len, thank you for the CD
Baby, thank you for the Harry Potter book 5 :)

Your soul is bound to the White Rose: The
Pure.

"I've been waiting in the dark for a long
time, shining my beacon of hope through the
shadow. If you see me, don't you hide your
eyes from me."

The White Rose is associated with purity, honor,
and chastity. It is governed by the goddess
Artemis and its sign is The Cross, or Agape.

As a White Rose, you are a person of your word.
You may have a strong moral code, but
regardless of your virtue, you always stay true
to yourself. To you, love is the most pure of
emotional forms and it's just a matter of
waiting for it to bless you. Some people may
say you are too idealistic, but it's only
because you don't want to mess things up.


What Rose Is Your Soul Bound To?
brought to you by Quizilla

The Spirited Leader - You are usually the one who
accepts tasks that others find daunting. You
work hard and are not afraid to make sacrifices
if you believe in the cause. Unfortunately, you
always end up feeling overwhelmed and lonely.
You can keep your chin up however, because
you'll always succeed, no matter how long it
takes.


What Type of Storybook Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Today is December 8, 2003 the feast of the Immaculate Conception. I attended the mass this morning and was touched by the homily of the priest. I don’t know if it was just a coincidence but I’ve found a site with the same content as his homily. Here it is:

THE IMMACULATE CONCEPTION
(Declared a dogma December 8, 1854 by Pius IX)

On this day, so dear to every Catholic heart, we celebrate first of all the moment when Almighty God, in a vision telescoping the ages, showed Mary both to our first parents and to the demon, as the Virgin Mother of the future divine Redeemer, the Woman destined to crush the proud head of the serpent. This episode is narrated in the first book of Scripture, Genesis chapter 3. We find Her again in the last canonical prophecy of the Bible, the Apocalypse or Revelation of Saint John the Apostle, as the Woman clothed with the sun, having on Her head a crown of twelve stars. In this beautiful vision She is also identified with the persecuted Apostolic Church, obliged to flee into the “desert”, and as the Mother of a great Head of that Church, destined to govern the flock of the latter times in the final combat, who like that flock is Her own Child. (chapter 12) Mary, like Her Son, is at the beginning and the end of all God’s intentions, an integral part of His designs for the Redemption of the human race.

for the full article, click here.

Seeing Cole last night moving heaven and hell, even going back through time just to be with phoebe made me think about a lot of things. As a romantically inclined person, I’ve dreamt of having someone like him who will not give up on me no matter what. But the episode of charmed last night made me wonder if that is the love I really want for my self.

It also made me realize that love is really a complicated thing. It is very hard to draw a line between “perfect” and “obsessive” love because both involves caring for a person a lot. And with this I am very grateful that God gave us Corinthians 13: 13 with a guideline of what love is really all about.

1 Corinthians 13:1-13

13:1 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.

13:2 And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing.

13:3 And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.

13:4 Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,

13:5 Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;

13:6 Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;

13:7 Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.

13:8 Charity never faileth: but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away.

13:9 For we know in part, and we prophesy in part.

13:10 But when that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be done away.

13:11 When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.

13:12 For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.

13:13 And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity.

But it does not make me like Cole less. In fact I am sad for him; if he has any consolation, it is that I pity him for his love has been unrequited.

This morning while searching for the meaning of the name “anica”, which by the way is not very pleasant since most of the sites containing the said name is either a porn site or a foreign language site (not included in the list of languages I know, which unfortunately are only English and Filipino), I found this very nice website about name meanings. Want to check the meaning of your name? Here it is:

Please note that the list of names below are owned by the people who either interests me or loves me :) and as usual, my name is not included in the list :(

Adara : AH-druh : arabic "virgin"
Aiko : IGH-koh : japanese "little love, beloved"
Anica : ah-NEE-kah : spanish "graceful"
Arlene : ahr-LEEN : irish "a pledge"
Elizabeth : ee-liz-ah-BETH : hebrew "god's oath"
Erik : EHR-ik : scandinavian "ever-powerful"
Eudocia : YOO-do-shee-uh : greek "esteemed"
Laila : LAH-ee-lah or LAY-luh : danish "night"
Helen : HEL-en : greek "bright one"
Hoshi : HOH-shee : japanese "a star"
Mark : MARK : latin "warlike"

~~~

by the way, it think it was yesterday when the king of Filipino action movies, Fernando Poe Jr. declared that he would join the 2004 presidential race.

I have nothing against him or whatsoever; it’s just that I can’t imagine him being the president of our country. not when people who have more experience and more knowledge about governing are having a hard time doing it. what if even ang pagiging baranggay captain eh hindi niya naranasan? Pano kaya niya patatakbuhin ang bansa na may humigit kumulang na 8 milyong katao ang naninirahan? I’m just wondering…

Hay... is he another ERAP in the making? Well, let us wait and see but it’s kinda scary just thinking about it.

i like this signature :

"Sometimes I wish I were a little kid again; skinned knees are easier to fix than broken hearts."

I was assigned to the NCE for today :)

4th WEEK OF NOVEMBER

VIRTUE FOR THE QUARTER: UNIVERSAL CHARITY
VALUE FOR THE MONTH: FOSTERING COOPERATION

Keeping Open to the World

Forge unity with neighbors
not at the expense of all others
nor to the exclusion of the broader good.

Good regionalism remains open
to every opportunity to contribute
to the welfare of the human family.

The whole world is our charge
We cannot shirk our responsibility
as citizens of the international community.

~~~ My commentary ~~~

No man is an island. We cannot live alone nor can we do anything on our own. Every thing is interconnected. What we do now can affect the people around us in one way or another.

Politically speaking, the president cannot do everything on her own. Even if she will be given the chance to be a president all her life she cannot accomplish every single task and implement every single project without the help of those people below her. That is why she has her vice president, secretaries, undersecretaries and many other assistants below her.

In a corporate setting a simple work can prove to be very crucial in the overall result of a certain plan or output.

Let no man compare two jobs and say that one is bigger than the other because at the end of the day no matter how big or “small” your work is when we scrutinize the end product, it will not be what it is suppose to be if you did not do your work well.

Always remember that a good worker not only think in a microscopic view but also look and work in a macroscopic perspective, thinking not only of himself but the effect of his existence to the world. And that in the end there are no triangles where there are people at the top and people below but only circles where everybody is equal and important.

Thank you! :)

well said :)

"GOD MAY HAVE CREATED MAN BEFORE WOMAN BUT THERE IS ALWAYS A ROUGH DRAFT BEFORE THE MASTERPIECE".

i am color...

BLUE You give your love and friendship unconditionaly. You enjoy long, thoughtful conversations rich in philosophy and spirituality. You are very loyal and intuitive. Find out your color at Quiz Me!

my past life...

now, shouldn't you be worried?

Guada was a Brave Executioner in a past life. Discover your past lives @ Quiz Me

Jing-Jing was a Saucy Wizard in a past life. Discover your past lives @ Quiz Me

Guada Gurl was an Attractive Bum in a past life. Discover your past lives @ Quiz Me

good news naman:

my best friend in high school is already pregnant! :) she got married last september 27 this year. by the way i was her maid-of-honor :)

and

today is november 13, 2003: 5 years and 3 months :) i love you baby.

hehe =D

A middle school was faced with a unique problem. A number of girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick they would press their lips to the mirror, leaving dozens of lip prints. Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night.

To demonstrate how difficult it was to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance guy to clean one of the mirrors. He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it into the toilet, and then cleaned the mirror. Since then there have been no lip prints on
the mirror. There are teachers . . . and then there are Teachers.

Did I mention that I love Gilmore girls? Not yet? Well, I do, I love them so much! :) Here is an excerpt from Gilmore-Girls.net:

RORY: And he's preppy, and I don't really like preppy. Plus, he's gonna go study in Barcelona next year.
LORELAI: So?
RORY: So it's a waste of time. It can't go anywhere.
LORELAI: It could go to dinner, maybe a movie.
RORY: Mom. . .
LORELAI: No, look, Rory, I know you've never really dated.
RORY: What are you talking about? I've dated.
LORELAI: Who did you date?
RORY: Dean.
LORELAI: You and Dean did not date. You had a relationship.
RORY: Well, Jess.
LORELAI: Was relationship number two.
RORY: So maybe I've never dated, but you haven't either.
LORELAI: I have dated at least once.
RORY: Mmhmm. You had me with dad - relationship.
LORELAI: Yes, but -
RORY: Max - relationship. Dad again - relationship.
LORELAI: Okay, fine, I may not be the world's best dater, but I do it and you should give it a shot. I mean, you're in college now. What else is there to do in college but date?
RORY: I'm gonna go wash my clothes now.
LORELAI: Wait. Was that it? Is this conversation over? Sorry, did I win?

~~~

Come to think of it, Rory and I are on the same shoe. I’ve never really experienced “dating”. Well if you can call a lunch with someone you like (with your best friend tagging along) a date, and then maybe I’ve dated. But it hardly fits my description of dating.

I would often tell my boyfriend that I would like to experience dating some time, with other guys, I mean -- now don’t get me wrong, I love him so much and we enjoy each other’s company. But this thought is very persistent and would never leave my mind ;) curious? maybe...

I don’t know how he feels about this. I consider him naman as my bestest-best friend (if ever there’s such a term) so I hope he understands. Probably he thought I was just joking whenever I say those things since he would just laugh, shrugs the topic off or tease me about it. But I am serious. I really am.

Now… I have this classmate whom I would like to ask out for a dinner or a lunch, maybe. He is not my crush or anything, I just find him very interesting. Maybe someday when I already have the guts to go beyond my usual self :) I’ll do it.

blog update: did some changes, put some things to look at and...uh-huh... i still have a long way to go...

i really really have to find a good scanner for my "self portrait" to be posted here :) hope i can post it by next week :) me, excited!

I lost my temper this morning over the supervisor of MRT (shaw blvd. station) grrrrrr! he made my day, alright! why can't they just admit that it's their machine's fault and not mine? grrrrr! $*&%#@!

slightly IRRITATED!
Why does she always have to dip into everything?

after so many sleepless nights of studying, which by the way were not effective since i still had to leave a number of questions unanswered, finally the semester is over. i got B in EC 220 (macroeconomics) and still no grade yet in EC215 (price and allocation theory). but the sem’s over. it’s really over! :) i can do whatever i want, read as many books as i can and watch TV as often as i desire. yup, this is life :)

~~~

i can't believe it! my mami's visiting my site (and giving comments too :) oh well... i'm so impressed, flattered and uhmm... grateful (?) yeah, thank you :)

with regards to your comment about mark... well he IS kinda stubborn... but not as stubborn as my papa and I hope he will never be one. :)

p.s.
your comment really, REALLY got me thinking… uhm… i’m keeping my fingers cross, though…

check this out. it's totally weird.

hehehe, i would probably say and do the same thing :) girls...

A Dinner Conversation Gone Wrong...

WIFE: "What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?"
HUSBAND: "Definitely not!"
WIFE: "Why not - don't you like being married?"
HUSBAND: "Of course I do."
WIFE: "Then why wouldn't you remarry?"
HUSBAND: "Okay, I'd get married again."
WIFE: "You would? (with a hurtful look on her face)."
HUSBAND: (makes audible groan).
WIFE: "Would you sleep with her in our bed?"
HUSBAND: "Where else would we sleep?"
WIFE: "Would you replace my pictures with hers?"
HUSBAND: "That would seem like the proper thing to do."
WIFE: "Would you play golf with her?"
HUSBAND: "I guess so."
WIFE: "Would she use my golf clubs?"
HUSBAND: "No, she's left-handed."
WIFE: - - - silence - - -
HUSBAND: "Shit."

well? :)

The Good Guys
Source: The Manila Times

By: Mark J. Macapagal

I've received a lot of e-mails where people mention that I do not think in the manner typical for most men. They comment that I'm sensitive to people's feelings, observant, communicative, determined, caring, etc. While it's true I do believe I possess these qualities to some degree, what I find odd is that I find quite a number of women say that it's rare. That I'm supposed to be some sort of oddball male, totally unlike the cads and jerks that they've been dating all their lives. Thing is, I'm pretty sure I'm not rare at all. I just think that people have this tendency to look in the wrong places.

A group of women that I worked with at my old computer company were having lunch one day and I sat down with them, just in time to catch the middle of a tirade against my gender. My co-workers went on and on about how men just wanted "one thing," never treated them right, and that there were no good husbands to be had anymore. No one who would be faithful, loving and a good provider, basically, was what I caught from their conversation.

Eventually, they naturally focused on me, the male at the table, and were waiting for my input so that they could refute it and continue moaning about the decline of eligible bachelors. I finished my sandwich and then said, "No, there are plenty of good guys. Like Doug, for instance..."

"Doug?" one woman questioned. "That quiet, bookish fellow in database? He's so boring." At this point, I interjected, "Yeah, he might be, I don't know. But the thing is, you're all wailing about finding good men and you're looking for them in bars, parties, discos, wherever. Hasn't it occurred to you that any of the guys you meet in these settings are probably not the marrying kind?"

The table was quiet so I continued, "You see, if you want the stable, faithful, consistent men, you have to look at the accountants, the bookkeepers, these men. I think it stands to reason that it's the men who lead quiet, comfortable lives are the ones who would make the best partners. Since you're looking for good conversation, I would think the guys who spend their time reading books instead of drinking beer and playing cards would be the better bet. Family values your thing? Then I suppose the guy who's active in his parish would be the ticket for that."

"But that's kind of boring, I don't want that," another woman said. "Well, that is right," I answered. "But there you go again. If you're attracted to the power broker who drives a Porsche and picks up women every night, what makes you think that this man will be sensitive and caring to your needs? You like the guy who takes you to all the hot spots in town? Haven't you thought that for him to know all the hot spots, he's probably been going to all of them already with women other than yourselves?"

"See, the exciting guys, the 'bad boys'?" I said. "Yeah, make no mistake, they are a hell of a lot more fun than going out with the geeks. But you are running the high risk of falling for someone that's not going to treat you as well as you'd like. So you go for the 'bad boys' and you keep this silly little notion in your head that they're going to change because of you when really, they're not going to. And when your relationship comes to its inevitable, bloody end, you call the guy was a jerk and a cheat but, if you think about it, he was already that when you met him. So what's the big surprise then?"

The table was pretty silent after that. I guess they were expecting me to be easy pickings, or to simply concede to their girl power affirmation session. In the end, I think they did realize the truth in what I said. Later, one would tell me that her past relationships were littered with musicians, artists, racecar mechanics, etc, and not one "smart pick" in the bunch, was how she put it.

I suppose I'm just saying that if you keep to a lemon grove, you're going to keep picking lemons. That if all the men in your circle are of a certain type (that you don't like), then it's time to expand your circles. Because I think you'll see, there's a lot out there once you make it out of your comfort zone and start looking at those you might never have looked at before.

i was supposed to post this 2 weeks ago, kaya lang lagi ko nalilimutan :) better late than never di ba? :)

20-sept-2003
1:52 am

Still awake. Studying for my exam on MACROECONOMICS on Monday. Mama & papa just left. They're off to MANAOAG. I think it's papa's promise to visit our Our Lady there. I don't know if "na-inis" is the right term, but that's what I feel towards papa right now. While mama went inside our dorm to take a shower, he was outside in the jeep waiting. I asked him to come inside but he was too stubborn (I got this characteristic from him, I must admit :) to heed to my call. what I like sana is for them to stay & rest until the dawn breaks and yet he choose to stay there. sad lang kasi I miss them both so much and that I know pagod na sila (they attended a birthday party before they proceeded here). this is one of those times when I wish papa's more like mark. why? because mark is not stubborn. He listens. God! I also miss him. hay... I miss them all.

21-sept-2003
12:15 pm

Just watched METEOR GARDEN and this line got me thinking: asi hanga ako sa'yo, minsan nakakabuti rin ang simple mong pagiisip (or something to that effect). This line was suppose to be a joke but come to think of it, what ximen just said is true. That's why Jesus preferred to be in the company of children because for them life is a very simple thing, no lies, no pretensions, no complications, no worries.

When asked last Sunday in the THE BUZZ about who’s better looking between the two members of the F4, Kris Aquino answered that Joey Marquez looks better than anybody. She delivered this with a smile and a twinkle in her eyes…clearly a sign of a romantic love, if not sexual. I laughed at her and called her blind. Since in my opinion, those members of the F4 were much, much better looking than Joey Marquez.

And then… I saw Kris Aquino being interviewed yesterday in TV Patrol.

I do not know what really happened between the two of them in that room. No body knows since they were the only ones inside and who can say what really took place. We could only speculate, and hear their sides of the story, their realness and their fabrications. But for whatever it is worth, I pity her.

Imagine Kris Aquino, not being “Kris Aquino” and Joey Marquez, not being “Joey Marquez”. Without fame and fortune. Imagine her being a simple woman, whom you can brush elbows with in the streets. The same goes with him. And then suddenly you hear the same predicament. Would you still like/love him? I won’t. With what happened to them, the boundary goes beyond show business, it goes straight to the gate of human rights, particularly Women's Human Rights.

As a person, it is normal to be in love, to get jealous, to be angry, and to feel pain. But as far as I know, it is not normal to degrade a person up to the point that he/she will lose his/her self-respect. And beyond doubt it is not normal to point a gun, a loaded gun, to anybody just because you are angry, for next time (and I quote) “It would be easier for him (her) to pull the trigger...”

Joy is not the absence of suffering; it is the presence of God.

September 24, 2003
09:46:42

Faith is an oasis in the heart, which will never be reached by the caravan of thinking. – Kahlil Gibran

September 23, 2003
09:16:06

Permanent good can never be the outcome of untruth and violence. –Mahatma Gandhi

September 22, 2003
09:45:08

This really made me laugh :) read on!

TENDJEWBERRYMUD

Its amazing, you will understand the above word by the end of the conversation...... Read aloud for best results.
Be warned, you're going to find yourself talking "funny" for a while after reading this :)
The following is a telephone exchange between a hotel guest and room-service at a hotel in Asia, which was recorded and published in the Far East Economic Review.....

Room Service (RS): "Morny. Ruin sorbees"
Guest (G): "Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service"

RS: "Rye..Ruin sorbees..morny! Djewish to odor sunteen??"

G: "Uh..yes..I'd like some bacon and eggs"

RS: "Ow July den?"

G: "What??"

RS: "Ow July den?...pry, boy, pooch?"

G: "Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry, scrambled please."

RS: "Ow July dee bayhcem...crease?"

G: "Crisp will be fine."

RS: "Hokay. An San tos?"

G: "What?"

RS: "San tos. July San tos?"

G: "I don't think so"

RS: "No? Judo one toes??"

G: "I feel really bad about this, but I don't know what 'judo one toes 'means."

RS: "Toes! toes!...why djew Don Juan toes? Ow bow singlish mopping we bother?"

G: "English muffin!! I've got it! You were saying 'Toast.' Fine.
Yes, an English muffin will be fine."

RS: "We bother?"

G: "No, just put the bother on the side."

RS: "Wad?"

G: "I mean butter...just put it on the side."

RS: "Copy?"

G: "Sorry?"

RS: "Copy...tea...mill?"

G: "Yes. Coffee please, and that's all."

RS: "One Minnie. Ass ruin torino fee, strangle ache, crease baychem, tossy,
singlish mopping we bother honey sigh, and copy....rye??"

G: "Whatever you say"

RS: "Tendjewberrymud"

G: "You're welcome"

Belief is truth held in the mind; Faith is a fire in the heart. – Joseph Fort Newton

September 13, 2003
17:20:19

For God Himself works in our souls, in the deepest depths, taking increasing control as we are progressively willing to be prepared for his wonder.

September 12, 2003
09:17:06

1. Is the name you have now the same name that's on your birth certificate? If not, what's changed?
yup-yup :)

2. If you could change your name (first, middle and/or last), what would it be?
From a simple: Guada B. Ramos
To: Maria Guadalupe B. Ramos

3. Why were you named what you were? (Is there a story behind it? Who specifically was responsible for naming you?)
My grandfather (the dad of my father) and I have the same birth date, December 12, which also happens to be the feast of Our Lady of Guadalupe. They told me that it was really supposed to be Guadalupe but my grandmother (the mom of my mother) objected to so i ended up having only the first half, the Guada part. While my grandfather carried the second half, which is Lope.

4.Are there any names you really hate or love? What are they and why?
LOVE:
Name:
Maria Helen, Maria Beatrice, Maria Elena/Elenita, Maria Guadalupe, Rhodora Ramonette, Rosa Asuncion, Erick/Enrico, Jose Leandro, Ricardo, or anything that sounds Spanish

HATE:
Name:

Michelle, Grace, Mark
very common. I know at least 5 girls who’s name is “Michelle.” same goes with “Grace.” Same reason with the name Michelle and Grace. I can identify more than 5 individuals with that name, including my boyfriend :)

Kristine
When I was in high school, Kristine is synonymous with bitch.

Anna
common name attachment

5. Is the analysis of your name at kabalarians.com / triggur.org / astroexpert accurate? How or how isn't it?

From kabalarians.com:

Brief Analysis
The name of Guada creates an overly-sensitive nature which causes you to sense and feel far more than you can understand or put into words. You have a deep, artistic, and creative side, which shows through a love for music and literature. Writing is a more natural mode of expression for your deeper thoughts and feelings than the spoken word. You have an ability to concentrate and work intently on anything, which holds your interest. However, you prefer to avoid routine, monotony, and mental tasks. You enjoy the out-of-doors and find your greatest peace and relaxation from the beauty and harmony of nature. You prefer to limit your friendships and associations to those who share your interests and appreciate your quiet, refined ways. Others often find it difficult to understand you. Your feelings tend to build up within you and, if you cannot release them through a creative, constructive channel, you could suffer with frustration, moods, and much inner turmoil.

more acceptable than my name description in triggur.org. while I cannot understand the astroexpert description.

We can walk without fear, full of hope, courage and strengths… waiting for the endless good, which God is always giving as fast as He can get us to take it in.

September 11, 2003
10:11:08

Your living is determined not so much by what life brings to you as by what you bring to life. – John Homer Miller

September 10, 2003
09:47:17

If you believe in the Lord, He will do half the work – but only the second half. He helps those who help themselves. – Cyrus H.K. Curtis

September 9, 2003
10:13:44

All the joy in the world comes from focusing on the well-being of others, all the suffering in the world comes from focusing on our own.

September 8, 2003
14:31:19

No life is ordinary. Each, no matter how small or insignificant, is a tiny spark of Divinity. – Margaret Weis

September 7, 2003
09:28:13

No life is ordinary. Each, no matter how small or insignificant, is a tiny spark of Divinity. – Margaret Weis

September 7, 2003
09:28:13

If there is to be any peace it will come through being, not having. – Henry Miller

September 6, 2003
09:22:39

Thank ME, it’s Friday! ;-) – God

September 5, 2003
10:30:35

my... my first friday five and look at the topic... oh well, here it goes:

1. What housekeeping chore(s) do you hate doing the most?
dish washing & cleaning of the fridge. can laundry be included?
2. Are there any that you like or don't mind doing?
cooking.
3. Do you have a routine throughout the week or just clean as it's needed?
just when needed. sometimes, even if it is needed, i still don't do it :)
4. Do you have any odd cleaning/housekeeping quirks or rules?
i am an OC, everything should be on its proper place afterwards. i don’t throw away things.
AND no one, as in NO ONE should interrupt me while i'm cleaning or else i'll stop doing whatever i'm doing at that moment kasi tatamarin na'ko.
5. What was the last thing you cleaned?
my drawer, last night lang :)

Thank ME, it’s Friday! ;-) – God

September 5, 2003
10:30:35


thank you :)

Our goodness is not determined by what we do not do and who we exclude, but by what we embrace and who we include.

September 4, 2003
09:15:58

still bumming around...

i was sad yesterday :( i heard that today Dr. Cabrido’s going to interview prospective applicants for the position that i’m vying for . i know God always reminds his children to wait for their moment to shine. when will be my time kaya? i hope soon. i hope soon so that i’ll be able to help my parents. hay…i’m getting impatient. sorry God :( please don't ever get tired of me.

It is the heart that makes a man rich. He is rich according to what he is, not according to what he has. -- Henry Ward Beecher

September 3, 2003
10:36:51

We must know we have been created for greater things, not just to be a number in the world. We have been created in order to love and be loved. – Mother Teresa

September 2, 2003
09:42:53

God will not look you over for medals, degrees, or diplomas, but for scars.

September 1, 2003
17:11:13

The highest spiritual plane available to humankind is neither grace nor peace nor satisfaction. It is of course, LOVE. – Julian Priest, the Hunger (1997)

August 31, 2003
10:37:33

Strength does not come without struggle. Relief does not come without pain. Cry and grieve, but remember God is out in the rain with you, offering an umbrella.

August 30, 2003
15:59:48

i feel so useless today :)

i did not do anything but:
read my chicken soup for the soul files, which made me feel good for the whole day

clean my drive c for some unnecessary files. you see the size of my my document’s folder is 400+ MB. now it is only 344+ MB. still big but at least i dislodge some of my file clutter.

wait for my computer to prompt me for a new mail :)

and wait for one of the phones to ring so that I can at least talk to somebody.

that is how dull my day was. :) nagsayang lang ako ng money for food and transportation fee. anyway, i’m going home now. bye!

Every time you pray sincerely, there will be a new feeling and new meaning in it, and you will understand that prayer is an education – Fyodor Dostoyevsky

August 29, 2003
11:28:17

But if these Angels guard you, they do so because they have been summoned by your prayers – Saint Ambrose

August 28, 2003
12:00:04

Photo Highlight
Mars is seen in the night sky over the coastline at Corona del Mar state beach in Newport Beach, Calif., Monday morning, Aug. 25, 2003, at 5:00am PT. Mars and Earth reach their closest encounter in 60,000 years this week. (AP Photo/Wally Pacholka, AstroPics.com)
Tue Aug 26, 6:53 PM ET

Yahoo! News Wed, Aug 27, 2003

happy birthday dear mark :)
all the best for you my love. cheers!

5 years...

huh!5 years?!

5 years. :) amazing. what's instore for us now? ndi ko rin alam eh. let's just hope and pray for the best :) mah! i love you.

july 27, 2003 - there's another coup attempt from the junior officers of the military. this time, i want them to win the game. unfortunately at the end of the day, they “lay down their arms” and went back to their stations :( wierd? ndi naman. nagkataon lang na naniniwala ako sa mga pinaglalaban nila. tapos sa bandang huli parang wala ring nangyari.

~~~

i just love MARK NELSON. he seems to be a very sweet, sensitive and kindhearted man. in addition to these he is so so sexy :) and he also got a nice name combination. Nelson (actually nielson) is the name of my crush in grade 6 (oh, if you would have noticed, i didn't even bother to conceal his name that's because i don't think he knows this site exists or better yet if i exist. so why bother, di ba?) and mark is the name of my boyfriend, whom by the way i love so much.

sana lang i could get a picture of him, the one posted in every bench store. he looks so guwapo there :)

~~~

last saturday (july 26, 2003) i'm watching "sana maulit muli" staring lea salonga as a filipino immigrant in america and aga mulach, here in the philippines, as her fiancé who's also a family bread winner.

the film is divided into 3 parts.

part 1 established lea & aga's relationship with each other; lea's relationship with aga's family & vise versa; aqa with his parents; and their view towards staying here in the philippines and migrating to america (the so called promise land for the filipino people).

part 2 started when lea left for the states. here problem starts. she started missing aga. unfortunately aga's too busy working his butt out for their upcoming wedding & therefore neglecting lea. whenever lea called aga, he was either working or with his boss. please don't get the wrong impression that he doesn't love her anymore, what happened was that there's so much miscommunication between them because of the distance (see that's why i'm not in favor of long-distance relationships!).

in part 3, after a year & a half, it was clear that lea's already adjusted in the US, was in fact successful over aga. then one day aga called her. he's also in the states sent by his boss. they met, went out for dinner, had fun and rekindled the old flame all over again. but there was a twist of fate. lea now is an independent woman very unlike the one aga knew in the philippines. there aga observed & accepted the new lea while swallowing his pride & principles just to be with her. it went like that for a while.then one day he realized & he knew that he had to go back to the place where he belongs. and i just got so touched by his lines to lea when he announced his decision.

"hindi ko kayang magmahal ng di buo ang pagkatao ko. Nawawalan na ako ng respeto sa sarili ko. at ayokong dumating ang araw na mawalan ka na rin ng respeto sa akin."

and with this, she had to let go.

epilogue: in the end, the film illustrated aga as a successful officer in his company and as he went out of the building, he saw lea waiting for him. they hugged and held hands while walking side by side with the crowd :)

WALANG HANGGANG PAALAM
joey ayala

`di ba tayo'y narito
upang maging malaya
at upang palayain ang iba
ako'y walang hinihiling
tila ika'y ganoon din
sadya'y bigyang laya
ang isa't isa.

koro:
ang pag-ibig natin ay
walang hanggang paalam
at habang magkalayo
papalapit pa rin ang puso
kahit na magkahiwalay
tayo ay magkasama
sa magkabilang dulo
ng mundo.

ang bawat simula ay
siya ring katapusan
may patutunguhan ba
ang ating pagsinta
sa biglang tingin ay
tila walang kinabukasan
subalit `di malupig ang pag-asa

(ulitin ang koro ng dalawang beses)

I have trouble going home from class every Thursday night. It's not a problem of transportation, as i could easily get a ride by just patiently waiting for a PUJ by the lightened waiting shed just beside gate 3. It is the distance between our classroom (ICSI 211) and the main road leading to the gate.

I just couldn't figure out why every Thursday night, just after our EC 215 class, it seems that I’m the only one who's walking there. I don't usually go for ghost stories, but every time I take that road, i feel that there are a number of eyes watching me & mind you, it's not a very comforting feeling. Parang someone’s staring at me (kinda scary). The sad thing is that, the only person whom i can talk to in the class doesn't even offer me a ride in his car even only up to the gate. Hay... Pag ako nagka-kotse, I’ll be more considerate & sensitive for those who are in need. :)


written last Wednesday :) July 23, 2003

I went to Los Baños yesterday for an interview. I plan to transfer to any company who will hire me and give me good compensation for the skills and knowledge that I will impart to them (naks! as if :) preferably an NGO and of course, located in Los Baños.

After more than a year and a half here in UA&P, I opened myself up again to the idea of transferring to another job. Only a few months ago, I would constantly convince my two other officemates to stay and consider the benefits that they would get when they stay working in this university. I myself decided then that it is best to stay here until I finished my graduate studies in Ateneo. It is because the availability of resources that I can use while I’m still studying is almost endless (yeah, almost...).

That is until the fateful afternoon of June 25 when 2 laptops and 1 LCD got stolen right under our noses. Since then i had to live in paranoia.

Sad noh? I love this place. i love the CR here (because there is a constant supply of tissue paper inside each cubicle), i have my very own computer (with internet connection 24 hours a day), a good environment with nice people around and many more. But I guess when the desire and the drive to work is no longer within you, then it is time to let go of things and look for another (and greener) pasture to graze.

A Good News for the Filipino People

amazing! i would have never thought i'd still be alive to see this event. unfortunately economists believed that this would not have a long-term effect on the economic situation of the Philippines due to present situation and the outstanding debt (which stood at about $56 billion at the end of march) of our country. Well at least we will get what is rightfully ours from the very start. cheers!

on The Asian Wall Street Journal front page:

Money Stashed by Marcos to Go to Philippines
by James Hookway and Cris Larano

MANILA--Seventeen years after the Philippines began hunting for a multibillion-dollar fortune allegedly salted away by the late dictator Ferdinand Marcos, the country’s Supreme Court awarded to the government the only substantial loot Manila ever found: several hundred million dollars frozen in a Swiss bank account.

for you arlene...

"Scarred People Are Beautiful"
Rev. Charles Cooke

Man speaks:

I've seen a number of movies lately, Lord
like Romeo and Juliet.
The love of young people, at least in those movies,
is beautiful...
so simple... so total... so uncomplicated.
They seem so natural,
so free in their emotions, so clear in their feelings.
I wish I could be like that, Lord, but it can't be.
Why is it so?

I've been hurt, Lord.
I have trusted and been betrayed at times.
I have loved and received nothing in return.
I have tried hard to care and failed often.
I have shared my secrets and, heard them
whispered to others.
I have been warm and received a cold shoulder.

I have been through it, Lord.
I've fallen on my face.
I've banged my shins.
I've been bruised.
Look, Lord, I'm all covered with scars!

The Lord Speaks:

Maybe you haven't understood enough;
Maybe you haven't learned that human life is like that:
All saints are scarred.

Young love isn't the highest form of human love.
The greatest love comes from scarred people.
I know that many people stop loving so they
won't be hurt again.

But those people who do start over again,
who continue in spite of all,
who leave themselves open
to the possibility of being hurt again --

These people are able to love again in a deeper way,
a more understanding way,
a richer way.

Man's response:

I think I know what you mean, Lord.
I've met people like that...
and knowing them gives me courage.
The great people are those who continue
to love with their scars.
I like SCARRED PEOPLE, LORD --
THEY ARE BEAUTIFUL.

Live life to the fullest, you say!. At your heart you are a hedonist with a great imagination and verve for life. Be careful of using this enthusiasm as an excuse to ignore the unpleasant. Your selective focus could cause blindness.


Which monkey are you?
Another pointless diversion from Bijouriel

"...of life and music"

i love music and singing.

mind you, i do not have a good voice. i even blame my mom for not forcing me to have a voice lessons when i young. but i love it :) even if doesn’t love me back.

i love singing while working…
i have a number of cds in the office, mostly given by mark, and since i’m lucky enough to have a speaker attached to my computer, i have the pleasure of hearing and singing my favorite songs whenever i please particularly if my boss isn’t around.

while washing the dishes…
i once read a book written by a man who observed that woman (even little girls like me) consider washing the dishes/clothes as a “sacred time” for themselves to reflect about things. i can relate… especially if it is accompanied by music.

while studying…
do you know anyone/someone who can study and concentrate and memorize his/her lessons while there’s music (or any noise for that matter) in the background? no, don’t look at me cause i am not that someone. but since for me pleasure comes more from listening and mumbling the lyrics of the songs, it overthrows the desire to study.

while inside the church (eucharistic celebration)
i consider a mass without a choir as an incomplete mass. it’s like music sooths the soul and lightens up the spirit. i even heard that singing is like praying twice so i gladly sing my heart out to the lord! :)

and while walking…
oh, i must admit this one’s kinda crazy. but walking for me (and mark, i think), like washing the dishes/clothes is a beautiful time to think things over or even converse with god. sometimes when i’m so immersed in my thoughts, i even voice them out loud! and since at times it involves songs, siyempre i also sing :)

haha! weird noh? Oh well… i hope those who will read this will not have a second thought about me loosing my marbles :) cause i don’t, it’s just my way of muddling through the complications of life.

"Weekend Magic"

my papa gave me a hug last sunday. and boy, it felt so good! so I hugged him back :)

siguro nabigla lang yun hehe! :D oh well, wala na siyang nagawa but to hug me back.

"The Accused"

Date: June 25, 2003

People in the office that day:
1. VA – Program Director with car
2. ME – Program Assistant been here for more than a year and half, regular
3. CEH –Marketing Assistant less than a week, contractual
4. MM –Marketing Assistant less than three weeks, contactual
5. CA – Personal Marketing Assistant of VA
6. MHP – Personal Researcher of VA with car
7. Lito – Personal Driver of VA

Lost Items:
1 laptop owned by VA (ACER)
1 laptop owned by MHP (HP)
1 LCD projector owned by the program (INFOCUS)

* Estimated amount of the lost items: Php 250,000.00

Who had the keys?
VA entrusted me with a duplicate key to his office last year at around October or November (not sure). The guard also has a key to his office, which they lend to the Janitors every morning to clean his room.

MGH and I have the key to the white cabinet located outside the room of VA where we usually placed the old laptop of the program, the LCD projector and the lapel. I am in charge of that cabinet.

***

I arrived in the office at around 8:20 in the morning, while CEH arrived at around 8:40 am followed by MM at 8:50. MHP arrived first before CA.

At 10:30 am, CEH and I left for CFA to punch the handbooks for the incoming students. We returned to the office at around 12:30 pm. I saw CA using the laptop of VA and MHP using hers. I asked them (MHP, CA and MM) if they already had lunch, they told me: “not yet” and so I asked them to pack things up – like keeping all the laptops in their proper place, arranging all the papers and etc.

Earlier I pulled out the LCD from the said cabinet because VA had a presentation later that afternoon and he was supposed to bring that with him. I placed the LCD inside the room of VA along with the Lapel just in front of his desk.

Since CA was in charge of VA’s laptop, she asked me for the key of his room while MHP asked for the key of the white cabinet. I gave them the keys. MHP placed her laptop inside the cabinet beside the old laptop of the program. After placing the laptop inside the room, CA gave me the key of VA’s room, which I quickly placed inside my drawer along with my palm pilot and cell phone. I locked all of them inside and brought the key with me. I let MHP keep the key of the white cabinet since her laptop was inside. All of us left the room at the same time. I was the first one who went out of the door followed by CEH, MM and CA – (seconds interval). The last one to leave the room was MHP. We left the room at around 12:40 to 12:45 pm and went to the roof deck to eat our lunch. MHP, MM and CEH quickly sat down because they already had food while CA and I brought our food from the counter (“Abot-tingin” lang from our companion’s table).

After less than 30 mins (probably 20 mins later) we went back to the room. MM and CEH, after putting down their lunch bags, went to the restroom. Only three of us (MHP, CA and Me) were left in the room. As I was about to do my work, I noticed a pile of envelopes and papers on the conference room round table – you see I cleaned the area a day before and warned those were using it not to leave any mess or whatsoever on the top of the glass table. I quickly asked CA about it since she was the one working on that area earlier and when we looked at it, we saw that those were VA’s things. At the same time, MHP was opening the cabinet and saw that her laptop was missing. CA gave the assumption that maybe VA got both laptops (because the three of them are working on a book when the laptops were lost). We checked the room of VA and I, without thinking opened his door and to my surprise we did not need any key to open it, it was not locked. CA and I entered his room. CA went behind his desk to check his bag because she was assuming that VA left already. She saw that his bag was not there. I quickly dialed the cell number of VA but MHP was the one who talked to him. According to what I’ve heard from MHP during their conversation: at first, VA had the laptop with him, I assumed the line was not clear because when MHP asked him again, he told her that the laptop was with CA. After putting down the receiver, I called the guard to report the incident. After a few minutes VA arrived with the guards, instructing them to check all the possible exits here in the university.

Nothing was broken or damaged; my palm, cell phone and the key of VA’s office were still inside my locked drawer. Nothing has been misplaced. That’s why MHP and the police think that maybe there was connivance between the people inside the program and the thief.

I am not sure about the chronology of events after that but I went upstairs to the 6th floor to tell MGH about the incident but since she was not there yet, I asked the receptionist if she was able to have a glimpse of our missing laptops or if she saw any suspicious looking people from our room carrying a big bag. On my second attempt to inform MGH, I met EG (an office mate whom I only met a few weeks ago – I do not even know her last name. All I know is that her real name is toot-toot) at the door of the school of management. She was going out carrying a laptop and an inforcus LCD projector just like mine. By impulse, I told her “uy! Baka amin yan a!” or something to that effect. She just smiled and told me that the laptop and the LCD were from MScM and not ours. Unknown to me that the roving guard, named EF was following me. He reported this incident to the police. EG was also questioned and will undergo the lie detection test with us.

Reflections for Your Journey
explorefaith.org

The Words of My Mouth...
Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord; keep watch at the door of my lips. --Psalm 41:3

It is a response of passion. Speaking, that is. Words always follow the passion that pulses in the heart. We feel first and then we speak. When we feel deep love and tenderness in our heart, our words are gentle--brushed with the soft wool of a young lamb. When we are frustrated, hurt, or angry, our words are hard; they cut and rend without restraint. They chafe with the harshness of steel wool. We unleash words of anger and hearts are destroyed. We unleash words of tenderness and hearts are healed. But it all begins with the passion of the heart.

Pray that God will guard your lips so you speak only the words that bind and heal. When your words are like rich fragrant oil that soothes the world around you, you will find your own heart more peaceful and still.

Make me mute before others, Lord, until my words can flow from a heart of peace. Then let my words be the balm that soothes a troubled world.

--from Signposts: Thoughts for Meditation by Renée Miller

tomorrow, i will be out of the office. i will be going to ateneo to process my load revision form.

at last HP 5 is out! lucky are those who were able to have it.

i saw, i was able to hold (kasi for one reason or another, all of the copies are “hidden” under the cashiers’ desks, so i had to ask permission first to be able to hold it), unfortunately i did not conquer a copy. i do not have enough money right now. maybe next week… hopefully…

grabe ang nangyari sakin this Saturday just because I left "early" last friday. i gave the wrong schedule to one of the lecturers. in effect nagkasabay yung 2 invited speakers for the 10:30-12:00 sched. kaya yun! i got a very disappointing comment from my beloved boss: “guada…you messed up everything!” hayyy... buti na lang tapos na.

well... i guess everything turned out ok. :) i'm going home now. yipi!

i'm beginning to hate this day... :(

Reflections for Your Journey
explorefaith.org

Moving Toward the Sacred, Step by Step

Walking the labyrinth really somehow turns the key and the lock for
many people. Many people feel that they aren't living out what they're
here for; that they haven't found their sealed orders. And, of
course, sealed orders can change, too, as you move into a different
phase of your life.

When you're walking the labyrinth, it is symbolic of your path in
life. You realize that we're not only human beings on a spiritual
path; we're spiritual beings on a human path. That beautiful inversion
begins then as your spiritual self sees the bigger picture-- [you
realize] your presence here on earth is valuable, and you have
something to contribute.

Those are very good beginnings for us to get our feet on the ground,
to be able to understand, "Hey, we're here for a special reason,
each of us."

We're really in a cosmic dance--we're all on this planet together;
we're all walking the path together, whether we know it or not.

-- from "A Mirror of the Soul:
Exploring the Labyrinth as a Tool for Spiritual Navigation"
Interview with Lauren Artress

dear riza babeh!

happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday happy birthday. happy birthday to you! mwa!

hi apple, hi merla, hi baby and arlene! so busy... can't even mail you, much less update my blog... miss you all :(

for more than a year and a half i waited for the fifth book of the HARRY POTTER series. i am a big fan of it. i even bought the books, spending almost all of my half-month salary to acquire all four.

and so when my officemate told me that she already has a soft copy of the fifth book, i quickly asked her to send it to me through e-mail. and now as i was reading it, i’m having a second thought if it is the real one or not. well, after it's official release on june 21, i will surely find out. :)

"You have spent many lives and much treasure to bring freedom to many lands that were reluctant to receive it. And here you have a people who won it by themselves and need only the help to preserve it."
-- Corazón Cojuangco Aquino (b. 1933), President of the Philippines

happy independence day!

thank god, GMA declared tomorrow as a special holiday instead of today :)

as i was watching ally mcbeal last night, i manage to picked-up a line or two.

** as a matter of fact, the guy i loved the most died in my arms. would you like to see the scars?

josh groban was one of their guests in the show and he sung "to where you are."

~~~

the issue of sexual harassment with bishop teodoro baccani came in quite as a surprise. i don't know if it is true or not but if it is, shame on him--he destroyed the trust of the faithful. if not, i pitied him--he became a victim of a false accusation caused by men.

how can i ever find the words to express the happiness i've felt last saturday with my beloved Lisieux? I can only write in sequence and try to relieved the memories they presented to me as a gift I will surely cherish.

~~~

last saturday, i attended the wedding of kuya jo and merly at Barasoain Church in bulacan.

even though i slept late last saturday, i woke up early yesterday to meet my Lisieux brothers and sisters at megamall. we will go to bulacan together for the wedding.

I must admit i was worried. you see, i haven't been with these people for a very long time and yet when we saw each other i readily felt the warmth and belongingness that's always been embracing the community.

the travel to kuya jo's house lasted for about three hours. the journey was long but it definitely was full of laughter and "kamustahan" :)

we arrived there only a little before lunch. after eating, we proceeded to practicing our songs for the wedding. then we quickly went to the church for the celebration of kuya jo and merly’s love for each other.

there was a get together after the mass. at around 6:30 pm we decided to get going since it’s getting late.

on our way home, we sang, we laughed and we joked around like little kids in a school bus. i don’t know why but all of a sudden i felt free.

it’s like this, when i started working -- for almost three years now -- i’m always the follower. it affected my attitude towards those who are older and “superior” than me because with them, i’m always cautious. i always wanted to please them and surely i don’t want to offend any of them; in effect (although not wanting to) i fall behind in their shadows. but last saturday, even if there’s still the feeling of not wanting to offend anybody, i laughed, i sung and i kid around with them and felt comfortable with it. and i had a great time :)

~~~

next saturday, another sister will be wedded and there will be another chance to be together again.

~~~

it was a bit different from the weekend i usually have because this time i am not within the comfort zone of being with baby, this time i am with lisieux and i am also at home.

Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, 'What! You too? I thought I was the only one!'"
-- C. S. Lewis

~~~

arlene, kris and merla :) thank you for the words of encouragement.

~~~

(loida is one of out marketing assistant who will be leaving for Guam on tuesday. but she told me that she will be back on September to continue her work here :)

Dear Loids,

This is a thank you letter for all the things you’ve done for the program, for the people around us and for me.

Thank you for cheering me up whenever I feel depressed with my work.
Thank you for motivating me to do the things that has to be done.
Thank you for the ride every time we go home late.
Thank you for the laugh whenever I rolled my eyes on somebody.
Thank you for appreciating (and memorizing) “my” songs.
Thank you for the exchange of thoughts about love and life.
Thank you for the conversations that brighten up my day.
Thank you for keeping me company even for just a while.
Thank you for the sweetness.
Thank you for the smile.
Thank you for the friendship.
Thank you for everything.

I will really, really, really miss you :) I hope to see you again on September.

Hugs,
guada gurl

PS.
I was about to buy a new angel last night unfortunately it was out of stock. I want you to have this – It used to be mine :) -- hold it every time you pray or whenever you need guidance. Ingat ka palagi ha? ok?

I envy those people who update their blog/site everyday.

~~~

I feel depress now. my mama accused me of being a loner/anti-social again. she keeps on comparing me with my cousins. eh what does she want me to do? we are very different from each other. sad talaga. she even compared me to one of her officemates who doesn’t have any friend except her husband and kids. and whom, according to her, no one likes. pero may friends naman ako ah? :( ndi nga lang madami, kasi I really choose the people I want to befriend. but I’m polite to everybody. I just put so much value to the word friend so that I don’t confuse them with my acquaintances. i don't think she understands me.

this happened last Sunday. but it still bothers me until now…

yesterday, june 1, is the birthday of shê. she is the look alike of châ :)

{may 30, 2003 friday 5:21pm}

may 31= traffic

i've been inside the bus for about four and a half hours already and still there’s no hope of moving.

you might want to know the cause of the traffic -- it’s the annual tradition of Flores de Mayo. as a rule it’s the procession of the "reynas” & their “consortes” that’s causing all the commotions but most of the time it’s their “alalays” who are blocking the way of the passing vehicles thus casing the traffic. People more often than not hate this season because of the traffic. but i don't. i love this time of the year.

according to my grandmother, the "reynahan" started as a religious tradition. the priests or the "prayles" during the spanish time commemorated the search of Reyna Elena (the mother of Constantine the Great) for the cross that the romans used to crucify Jesus Christ.

the month of may is also considered as the flower month & the month of the Holy Mother. according to the tradition, the farmers, after a long period of summer season, would offer flowers and fruits to the holy virgin asking for the start of the rainy season. and every year, if you would notice rain would start falling as early as the last week of may.

when we were just a kid, my grandmother, whom i fondly called inay, used to put a pinch of mud in our navels whenever the first rain in the month of may drops. she said that it would protect us from a number of illness specially tummy aches.

while i’m already 23 years old now and equipped with proper knowledge on what to and what not to believe, i would still love to sit beside our window, watch the rain fall and wonder whether inay’s stories are real or just a silly tradition (which I hope is not :)

i got this from a friend whom i’ve only met through e-mail. i’d tried to shorten it by deleting the unnecessary lines. however as i went though it, i realized that every line is important to be able to understand what the author wants to convey….

SEVEN HABITS OF ENLIGHTENED SOULS

1. Be quiet. At least once a day, sit down. There is a source within each one of us called the spirit or soul. It is a crime to disturb the inner peace. This peace is our power to create positive things in our life. Try speaking softly and slowly than your usual way. Speaking this way is more powerful because it attracts the peace in others. Just be aware of your words. Savor their energy and rhythm.

2. Let go. Don't hold on to anything with your hand or with your mind. Many think that doing this means losing. If you don't release the old, you can't get anything new. This requires detachment. Letting go means moderating excessive attachment to material possessions, to emotions, or to the status quo or comfort zones in our lives.

3. Let it be. We are great fixers of other people's lives. We're trying to write somebody else's script. We are absent from our own lives because we're busy living the life of others. Acceptance and contentment are the first steps to healthy relationships. An example is our appreciation of the moon, which is beyond change. We never dream of wanting to change or influence it, nor have we the slightest remorse that the same face of the moon is always turned toward us: We have no need to see the dark side. Extend this deep feeling of acceptance to the people we meet.

4. Listen in. Use your intuition, the inner tutor and the voice of wisdom. Because we have held on to our false beliefs for so long, we ignore and distrust our inner voice and tell it to shut up. The process of enlightenment is the process of learning to trust that inner voice once again. Example is the conscience as intuition at work. When we misbehave, the voice of conscience alerts us to our mistake. We may shun that voice, engaging in reason as the ally of ego to justify our deeds. Yet the troubling intuitive disapproval of conscience will go on to make its rebukes. We can either suppress the advice or repair the wrong.

5. Wake up. Habits are programmed by our external conditioning. Write down your habits then decide which ones to strike out and replace them with virtues. Visualize the virtue you want to create and empower that image. For example, if you want to develop patience, visualize yourself as a patient person. Watch, feel and manifest patience in every action you do until it becomes your behavior. Waking up is to consciously choose your behavior and thereby create the personality you want. Never believe anyone who says, "You can never change."

6. Know yourself. Look behind the "I want" attitude, those desires that make us need things that are not necessary. The truth is, happiness is a choice, not a chore, a decision to bring out from the self. Affirm that you are happiness, a source of happiness.

i forgot to mention this last tuesday, World Health Organization (WHO) declared Philippines (our country) Severe Acute Respiratory Syndrome (SARS) free! yipi! :)

i can drink coffee anytime i want and as many :)

~~~

happy birthday danna and leynen! :)

i've attended the lecture of mr. fernan lukban on STRATEGIC THINKING & PLANNING and i've picked up a thing or two:

success is not always getting what you want. it is knowing what you want & when to stop wanting when you have it.

you can always do things even if you don't know anything about it provided that you like what you're doing.

RELEVANCE, USEFULNESS, VALUABLE & UNIQUENESS
usefulness is about skills.
relevant is about knowledge.
valuable is about value.
uniqueness is about being different.

if you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always gotten.

~~~

i don’t know what to think & feel about them. my mama told me that i should be happy about what happened, if not grateful. they're so cunning. they've taken advantage of my father. they've taken advantage of us...

nothing special happened today except that we're very busy in marketing our program.

my mama wants me to be like my cousins. while i prefer to stay at home, watch TV, read a book, sleep, or better yet eat until i'm stuffed, they, on the other hand, love to go out and experience the night life. she always accuses me of being an anti-social. she said that while other young adults are out and having fun after work, i'll be at home watching TV.

but what can I do, i am a couch potato, and a BIG one for that matter. i can stay inside our house for two whole weeks without going out (I am not exaggerating, really). just give me books, TV, a lot of food and that’s it.

and so yesterday, when my cousin, sol, asked me to be with them to meet her friends (since i am not the type who would easily say no) i simply said "yes" and got home at exactly 4 am in the morning to have a 3 hours sleep before work. we went to east wood, ate dinner there and then went to a bar in malate.

it was my first time to be in those places and i had fun (although i had to suffer the whole day because i am too sleepy to think so I had to drag myself from one task to another). but unlike them I cannot live like that regularly. grabe! If I’m going to do that every week, i have to learn how to smoke myself or else I’ll die of second-hand smoking. but it was ok, really! I had a great time, only, that’s not me. and again, i’d rather stay at home read, eat and fall a sleep while day dreaming about you know who :)

please read this: pure love

{May 18, 2003 Sunday}

Im on my way to manila now. Sad because im going back and will be away from my loved ones but i’ll be ok. they gave me enough memories to cherish and help me survive for the rest of the week.

~~~

We will be having study sessions this week and it will be a very busy one.

{may 17, 2003 saturday}

i wish i’m rich. So that I could help my mama & papa with our expenses.

~~~

Right now I’m watching SEX AND THE CITY. It was their special-three-part series. It’s decent enough compared to what my former boss is saying.

Ok, it talks about sex (and the word is included in their title) but that doesn't mean that it is their main focus. For these episodes they deal with topics like: having a baby, not having a father while growing up, having real friends to count on to in times of need, and many more.

People would often have the impression/misconception that it is an all-adult series when in fact some, I repeat “some” of their topics are realities that we have to face because they are happening in the real world and outside the tube.

~~~

I was wrong. I judged him too early. I was expecting that he would just mumble something (like he usually does) to acknowledge my presence. And yet he asked me several questions, like: what time did i arrive? and did i eat already etc. and that was enough to melt my hardening heart.

~~~

She’s the best, and I love her so much. Early in the evening, she was furious. And yet as time passed by she returned to her usual self--the loving and very caring mama that I knew. Ü

{may 16, 2003 Friday}

i'm having a déjà vu.

why is it that i cannot let go of my life in college? it's been 3 years already and yet the feeling's still the same...

it's as if whenever the world's shrinking down on me, i seek the place where i've spent my 4 growing up years; where I learned things beyond the 4 corners of a classroom; where i've found friends who've eventually became my sisters; and where, in the process of failing, pain & heart break, i've found & learn a thing or two about myself.

sometimes i get lucky in buying books :) and this is one of those times. i bought the book for only Php 25.00 from Power Books. it's original price is Php 205.00. it’s not a fairy tale of any sort but you will surely be holding your breath for the next thing that will happen to the princess. definitely a page turner.



~~~

{may 15, 2003 11:05 pm}

in the list of the reminders on how to prevent SARS, this was included:

"do not drink coffee because it lowers down your immune system."

to tell you the truth, when i first heard about this, i stayed away from coffee or anything with caffeine right away.

however as time passed by, i realized that no matter how we try to protect ourselves against harmful elements, if it is our time to die, then we will die.

so do I drink coffee now? nah :)

a very nice story...

WHEN WE NEED LOVE THE MOST

A university instructor posed a riddle to her graduate education class. "What has four legs and leaves?" she asked, hoping the students would realize that by considering alternative meanings to the words "legs" and "leaves" that they could arrive at the solution -- a table. However, one woman unexpectedly answered, "My last two boyfriends." Maybe you can relate.

People will leave relationships for any number of reasons and sometimes they should, for not every friendship has a healthy future. Some well-intentioned people come together in heat and passion and all that is left of the union when the fire goes out is a pile of ashes. Others bring along so many destructive problems and behaviors that a happy relationship has no chance of long-term survival.

But what about when friends, lovers or family bolt from the relationship at just the wrong time? After all, those we want to love are not always "lovable" or easy to get along with! Is a temporary lapse into craziness reason enough to run?

Author John Gray sometimes tells about a young mother who asked her visiting brother to get her some pain pills. He forgot and, when her husband returned home, she was upset and in pain -- more than a bit crazy. He experienced her anger as a personal assault and exploded in defense. They exchanged harsh words and he headed for the door.

His wife said, "Stop, don't leave. This is when I need you the most! I'm in pain. I've had no sleep. Please listen. You are a fair-weather friend. If I'm sweet, you're okay; but if I'm not, out you go!" And then tearfully, and more subdued, she said, "I'm in pain. I have nothing to give. Please hold me. Don't speak...just hold me." He held her and neither spoke -- until she thanked him for being there.

It is easy to love those who are at their best. But it is during those times we are unlovable that we may need love the most. And what a beautiful thing when we get it. And even more beautiful when we find the grace to give it.

mother's day was celebrated last sunday march 11, 2003

i know it's 2 days late but i'd just like to greet my mama a very happy mother's day. albeit she can't help herself but treat me like I am 13 instead of 23, i know she means well. although sometimes, it’s very annoying, i know that she loves me very much. thank you, mama. i love you very very much.

~~~

i am not a mom (yet). but i'd like to be one someday :)

these are the ads in honor of mothers all over the world:

ANG SARAP NG MAY NANAY

Sa iyo, Ina, lagi na lang kami ang una. Kaya’t sa araw na ito, ikaw naman ang bida. Happy Mother’s Day!

Blue Bay Tuna

***

Thank you for the many things you have given us. Happy Mother’s Day!
The Heritage Park

***

SALAMAT, ‘NAY!

Sa iyong pamamatnubay malayo ang narrating ko sa lakbay ng buhay ko.
Isang parangal para sa mga Ina hated sa inyo ng Dr. P The No. 1 Adult Diaper

***

Dearest Mom,
We may not always be together but we can surely keep in touch. Happy Mother’s Day!
Love lots,
Joy, Arjun & Nanni

making great things possible GLOBE

***

Ikaw naman ang aalagaan, pagsisilbihan at bubusugin ng pagmamahal. Araw mo ito Mommy.
Happy Mother’s Day mula sa Jollibee

***

Para sa’yo Mommy, isang taos-pusong 1-4-3. Happy Mother’s Day!
Eight O’Clock Sarap ng Alaga ni Mommy

***

PAG MOTHER’S DAY, LAHAT NAGIGING MAMA’S BOY.

Matanda man o bata, anak ka pa rin ng nanay mo. Kaya tawagan mo siy sa Mother’s Day gamit ang PLDT Touchcard. P3.00/minute lang. Kaya okay lang tagalan ang kwentuhan.

***

IT’S ALWAYS A GOOD TIME TO CALL

Mom would be happier if she were with you on Mother’s Day. So call her with SMART IDD.
For your mom working abroad, nothing else brings her much joy as hearing your voice. And with SMART IDD’s 40c a minute calls, you can do thins not just on Mother’s Day. No matter where you’re calling from, you can enjoy clear calls for hours. With SMART IDD, nothing comes between you and making mom happy on any day of the year.

***

INNER BEAUTY

Today we celebrate the woman who showed us what inner beauty is all about. Mother.
Happy Mother’s Day from Myra 300-E

***

FOREVER FIRST

To my first smile,
My first hug and first kiss.

To the one who always turns up first
in my defense.

The one who never made me feel second.
Not to my sisters, nor to career.
Not even to Dad.

The one who comes first in my heart,
Even now that you are so far away,
Happy Mother’s Day!

With Globe IDD,
Let my call be the very first you get.
For only 40c per minute,
I can spend all the time thanking you
For every first that you have been to me.

And this call certainly won’t be the last.

***

WHO WOULD HAVE EVER THOUGHT THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE WOULD BE SHORT AND BALD?

You always went for the tall, dark, mysterious types. You fell in love with one, married him and started a family. Then when the baby was born, an amazing new feeling hit you. And now, as much as you’ll always love your husband, this new little man just takes your breath away. Having a baby changes everything.

Happy Mother’s day from Johnson & Johnson

you'll only encounter this kind of news once in a life time :)

Elephant on the loose rounded up in Q.C.

An elephant broke free of its restraints at Araneta Coliseum in Cubao, Quezon City and scampered along EDSA before noon Thursday.

Police and the animal's trainer tailed the elephant as it stopped momentarily before continuing a slow trot toward Nepa-Q-Mart market in Cubao.

It was unclear how the elephant, part of the Elephant World show at the coliseum, escaped from its pen.

The animal was finally brought under control by its trainer near Tomas Morato Avenue in Kamuning district.

Armel Fernandez, radio dzMM

"Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something is more important than fear. The brave may not live forever, but the cautious do not live at all. From now on you'll be travelling the road between who you think you are and who you can be. The key is to allow yourself to make the journey."

--Princess Diaries

The Dante's Inferno Test has sent you to Purgatory!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Level	Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)	High
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)	High
Level 2 (Lustful)	Low
Level 3 (Gluttonous)	Moderate
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)	Low
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)	High
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)	Very Low
Level 7 (Violent)	Moderate
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)	Moderate
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)	Very Low

Take the Dante's Inferno Test

i wrote this last night using the palm pilot :)

{may 7, 2003 10:38pm}

if i'll see another SBEP brochure i'm gonna puke.

grabe! since yesterday we sent out almost 250 brochures for our marketing.

very tiring. yup! but at the same time, fulfilling. Ü

~~~

by the way, i’ve added a site meter here. slowly i'm learning, on my own.

"if you believe, you will receive whatever you asked for in prayer"
matthew 21:22 niv

i can feel that He is taking care of me.

how come that when you are at the lowest and saddest point of your life you will feel His power more than when you are happy?

whenever i cannot sleep at night, i will just ask Him to give me peace and let me sleep and that's it! i will be sleeping like a log the whole night :)

thank you for sticking with me. (do I give you much of a choice ;) hehe

mwa-mwa!!!

please don’t ever ever get tired of me. that is one thing i cannot afford.

~~~

i have a new toy :) palm pilot m100

i kinda liked it although i'm still in the process of learning how it works.

i know, i know, it's an old model. but what can i do? i dreamt of having this thing ever since i saw one on a newspaper ad.

Grow Old With Me
Mary Chapin Carpenter

Grow old along with me
The best is yet to be
When our time has come
We will be as one

God bless our love
God bless our love

Grow old along with me
Two branches of one tree
Face the setting sun
When the day is done

God bless our love
God bless our love

Spending our lives together
Man and wife together
World without end
World without end

Grow old along with me
Whatever fate decrees
We will see it through
For our love is true

God bless our love
God bless our love

~~~

if ever the time comes that i will be walking down the aisle, i want "my" man to sing this to me :) mushy-mushy-mushy!